Traveling solo isn’t the only option for women over 50 who may no longer have a spouse that can or wants to travel or you’re on your own through a divorce or some other circumstance. 

• I know, you have reservations about being a third wheel…

• How well will you get on…
  

• What if things go a bit sideways?

Well keep reading, I’m off to the UK in just over a week and meeting up with my high school Bestie and her hubby.

As a bit of backdrop, my bestie and I go back to the first day of high school landing in the same class together. 

We’ve lived in different countries and continents over the decades but when we get together its like we are 15-year-old teenagers again.

We live 12,000 kilometres away from each other but have visited each other in our adopted home countries.

We’ve traveled together as a foursome when my husband could still travel, as threesomes with her hubby and as twosomes just my friend and I.

Hesitant to leave hubby behind even if he can't or doesn't want to travel? Check out my blog on:

👉 🔗 📝 "Saying Yes To Traveling Without Hubby"

But once upon a time there was a FIRST TIME!

So, how do you make traveling with friends something truly magical to treasure for a lifetime?

Having Shared Travel Interests Is Key

First off we all love to travel and yes I know so many people love to travel but what kind of travel?

Our shared interests include but are not limited to:

• The three of us love to explore new places

• We love driving and even better my friends hubby loves to be the driver so we have a built in chauffeur

• We love outdoor locations, big vistas, oceans, historical places

• We don’t feel the need to hurry as in we like to stop soak in places with a coffee or tea

• We like to have a plan but be able to be flexible if things need to change

• We enjoy sharing and exploring our adopted countries with each other

Reconnecting And Sharing…

Part of traveling together is about creating new memories and experiences, it provides this continuity in your lifelong bond of friendship and strengthens it.

But an integral part of traveling together is reconnecting and having the time to go over past experiences and memories…

A trip down memory lane if you will lol - pun totally intended😜

We also have the opportunity to catch up on what we have been doing in our own lives thousands a miles away from each other since the last time we were together.

And, we contemplate all things in life around us and what comes next in our respective lives.

And it feels quite different when you are having these conversations looking out over a vista that you’ve never seen before.

It truly is magical🦄🌈🐶🪄💫

Making It Work

But lets face it like anything in life, marriage, job you have to work at it individually and collectively to make it work.

Not in any order but here are what I believe through experience the ingredients that make the magic happen.

No. 1 Play To Each Others Strengths

• My girlfriends hubby loves to drive - boom a strength right there

• He is also a phenomenal planner, kind of like a built in tour guide

• He has a great dry sense of humour

• He will talk to anyone - perfect for me being the gigantic introvert

• She is so incredibly calm and a go with the flow kind of person

• They are both genuinely excited and delighted at whatever they see. It can be raining cats and dogs, blowing a gale and they will still be out and about making the most of it.

• I’m the morning person so I know I can get up quietly and have that alone time to myself when I need it.

No. 2 Understand each others preferences and lifetime habits and respect them

Let’s face it ladies we don’t get over 50 and not be a little set in our ways☺️hmm…

And so do our fellow travel companions.

My girlfriend is NOT an early riser and I am.

No biggie, we all need some space and alone time when we travel with others.

So this is ideal, I get to hang out early in the morning doing my own thing and then we get rolling together.

Her hubby is English so still love a morning tea.

This has been so good for someone like me who constantly has to work at just being still and in the present…

So his habit has given me the opportunity to experience so much more when traveling.

Planning The Trip Together

Allow plenty of time for planning and having the back and forth emails, messages and calls especially if you don’t live close by which is our case.

Someone will always have an idea of what they want to see and do.

I love this because you can build on that. 

Don’t be shy if you don’t want to do something or it doesn’t appeal SPEAK UP during the planning!

Not being transparent about your likes and dislikes will for sure lead to friction so…

Communicate, communicate, communicate!

So my friends knew I was planning to go to a family wedding and...

Coincidentally it turned out to be during the same time frame that they were going to be in the UK.

At first when we shared our travel dates they suggested I join them in Edinburgh after the wedding for the Scottish Tattoo.

But I hesitated…

Don’t get me wrong, I love Scotland and would love to see the Tattoo but...

I just didn’t fancy dealing with the gazillion tourists for some reason on this particular trip.

Then we figured out that if I arrived before the wedding we could meet up and spend time in the Yorkshire Dales.

Boom, I loved the idea and their generosity of having me tag along as that third wheel.

They already had ideas of what they wanted to see and do which I was fine to go along with.

I think this is really important when traveling with friends…

Be Flexible

Go with the Flow

Any blips will be totally outweighed by all the great experiences you share together and individually

And most importantly BE GRACIOUS!

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Be Transparent And Share Any Concerns Before You Travel

Sounds obvious but too often we don’t want to have those what we think are uncomfortable conversations.

But here’s the thing chances are those small things that are lurking in your mind are probably equally in your friends mine too.

I traveled with my travel buddy last year to The Netherlands. And normally we are go, go, go from the moment we get up.

However, I wasn’t feeling in the best of shape, had gained a bunch of weight and so I told her up front that I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to keep you with her at her normal pace.

Having that conversation ahead of time was invaluable rather then getting there and frustrating both of us.

My friends are aware that I am an Intermittent Faster and we discussed the concern about eating lunches or stopping for those tea times.

I am perfectly comfortable not eating when others eat or I will have a black coffee so was able to reassure them that they didn’t have to “accommodate” me or feel bad if they want to stop and eat.

Allow Each Other Space

Traveling together means driving, taking tours, eating together, staying in the same place.

No matter how much we enjoy each others company, living in each others pocket 24x7 is a recipe for disaster.

So take the time to find and agree on accommodation that will give you all that space.

There is nothing wrong with having been out touring all day to come back and go to your respective spaces.

And when traveling with another couple I have become so North American so having separate bathroom space is key to happy travels!

You don’t always have to joined at the hip every minute of the day.

Be Up Front And Candid About Expense Sharing

OMG, the horror stories I’ve head about friends traveling together when it comes to money matters.

Stories like the friend whose friend purchased their own food and put it in the fridge and nobody else was allowed to touch it 😲

My friends tease me thinking I’m such a princess (which perhaps I am) and worry that we might not be staying in 5 star accommodation. 

Bottom line we share with each other what our budget expectations are and then collectively went looking for accommodation options that would satisfy the must haves on our collective list.

If you don’t already know do discuss what you expect to do about meals…

Do you want to eat out every night but they prefer a mix of eating out vs. preparing food back at the AirBNB?

My travel buddy who I regularly travel with ends up being the cook if we stay in places where we can cook.

I think she knows I'm hopeless so she knows if she cooks she will at least get to eat haha.

But also, her gift of cooking is for me having done all the planning and organizing of our trip...

So its a wyn-wyn 😊

Decide Who Will Book What

Decide WHO will be making any reservations and deposits and…

Make sure if any deposits have to be made in advance that you are clear on...

WHEN and HOW you will be paying your share.

Also be sensitive to preferences for tracking and paying things while you are actually traveling.

This is especially important if you live in different countries. Your favourite way to transfer money might not be available or easy for them to accept and vice versa.

When my travel buddy and I travel we have this routine of each rotating paying for meals or tours or taxis etc.

I am the unofficial keeper of tracking the what we each spend and then a day or two before our trip we do a true up.

She is always ecstatic when it turns out I owe her money haha.

Follow The Leader

Whether its a group going out to play around of golf, go shopping together, working together there is always a leader.

And its no different to traveling. Cast your mind back to when you were a child and you went on a family vacation. Was it mum or dad that got you all cracking and in the car on the way or dad?

So its no different decades later. 

When someone other than you even if you are typically “the leader” steps up to take charge, go with the flow. 

Be grateful that someone is prepared to lead and savour being a follower and along for the ride.

Wrapping Up

Don’t deny yourself the opportunity of traveling with friends, it is such an incredible gift.

Be realistic and flexible in your expectations and actions.

Be kind and gracious, your friendship is worth way more than a 85 cents difference on your share of a restaurant bill or spending a morning doing something that wasn’t top of your list.

And last but not least, have fun spending time with people you love and respect and get to have create memories of a lifetime!

Still looking for ideas, inspiration and just some good old fashioned experience?

Head on over to my YouTube channel:

Female Travelers Over 50 By Raewyn Crist: 👉@FemaleTravelers50Plus

And if you like what you see please consider subscribing to the channel or giving a video a like :-)

So cheers to wheels up to winging your way to your long dreamed of destination.